Wednesday, December 09, 2009

An Embarassment


Last night, while out with someone (A) at a place with an inconvenient name, I bumped into another familiar person (B), who shall, for various reasons, remain anonymous as well. It wasn't awkward, like I thought it would be, but we parted ways to sit at different places (a clue!) after exchanging the necessary pleasantries.

It wasn't until 2 hours later, when the place was closing, that I was forced to evacuate the premise, and therefore, bump into said person (B) again. I introduced B to A, and as A's whorish effervescent personality would have it, A started chatting B up.

I took a big gulp of what was left of my drink and joined in the conversation with much aplomb. Suddenly! B said something that completely caught me off guard.

B said, Why are you talking with a slang?
And I replied, No I'm not.
And B said, Yes you are.
And I repeated, No I'm not.

We left it as that.

30 minutes later, on the cab ride home, I thought about it long and hard, and it occurred to me that yes, I do believe I have been putting on an odd sort of accent recently. Only when conversing with (a) certain people person.

And for what? I cannot fathom. I just have been. And subconsciously too! It left me feeling deeply unsettled.

Tonight, as I was ploughing through the moor that is the Internet, I came across the wise words of The Almighty Cowboy Caleb. He hypothesised that "as you grow older, you realize that you have slowly become a product of your environment" (Such! Deft! Words!).

I don't want to end up as a click through rate, or as a unique visitor or a fucking web banner with a red curve. Especially not one with an accent.

I have also learnt that it is best that we keep off from the things that poison us or our minds. And what better timing than now!

So to put into practice what my flexibility-training, all-encompassing, multi-tasking job has taught me about planning, this is what I will do tomorrow:

1. I will wake up
2. I will go to work
3. I will arrive at work
4. I will go to your desk straight
5. I will retrieve my iPod cable
6. And I will not go upstairs for the rest of the day, week, month and year - Even if my boss threatens to machete my frontal lobe out

I do wish you were here with me, but a plan is a plan. And what are we if not plans and strategems?
Watch this space, people.

@ 12:02 AM | 0 comments